Kim Du Toit has a rant that has swept the blogosphere by storm called The Pussification of the American Male. He pulls no punches in this one, and sometimes steps over the line… but in the end, he’s damn right.
But the tides are turning.
Look at the heros of our time – they’re not the kind of emasculated American male that Kim DuToit writes about. They’re the men who threw themselves without fear or hesitation into two burning high-rises not knowing if they’d ever get out alive. They were throwbacks to the days when knights on white horses would fight dragons to save the damsel in distress. Except this time the knights wore Kevlar helmets instead of steel, held hoses instead of swords, and fought fires rather than dragons. They still saved those in distress.
Look at the bookstore. Right next to the usual pussyfied fare are books like The Greatest Generation. Those were real men. They went to places like Omaha Beach and faced a horror like nothing anyone’s ever seen before. You want to know what a real man is like: talk to a veteran. Talk to someone who charged a German machine gun nest, or even someone who rode a ship in the middle of the South Pacific not knowing if the next minute would see them blown apart by a Japanese submarine.
There are real men in Iraq right now, doing what real men do. They’re not only out there blowing the hell out of anyone who would fuck with them, but they’re helping kids learning how to play baseball, building hospitals, building schools, and fixing things. Your average GI is just as good as a wrench as he is with a rifle.
As Mr. Du Toit says:
But I’m not going to do that. To quote John Belushi (who was, incidentally, a real man and not a fucking woman): “Did we quit when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?“
Well, I’m not going to quit. Fuck that. One of the characteristics of the non-pussified man (and this should strike fear into the hearts of women and girly-men everywhere) is that he never quits just because the odds seem overwhelming. Omaha Beach, guys.
I want a real man as President — not Al Gore, who had to hire a consultant to show him how to be an Alpha male, and french-kiss his wife on live TV to “prove” to the world that he was a man, when we all knew that real men don’t have to do that shit.
And I want the Real Man President to surround himself with other Real Men, like Rumsfeld, and Ashcroft, and yes, Rice (who is more of a Real Man than those asswipes Colin Powell and Norman Mineta).
I want our government to be more like Dad — kind, helpful, but not afraid to punish us when we fuck up, instead of helping us excuse our actions.
I want our government of real men to start rolling back the Nanny State, in all its horrible manifestations of over-protectiveness, intrusiveness and “Mommy Knows Best What’s Good For You” regulations.
I want our culture to become more male — not the satirical kind of male, like The Man Show, or the cartoonish figures of Stallone, Van Damme or Schwartzenegger. (Note to the Hollywood execs: We absolutely fucking loathe chick movies about feelings and relationships and all that feminine jive. We want more John Waynes, Robert Mitchums, Bruce Willises, and Clint Eastwoods. Never mind that it’s simplistic — we like simple, we are simple, we are men — our lives are uncomplicated, and we like it that way. We Were Soldiers was a great movie, and you know why? Because you could have cut out all the female parts, and it still would have been a great movie, because it was about Real Men. Try cutting out all the female parts in a Woody Allen movie — you’d end up with the opening and closing credits.)
I want our literature to become more male, less female. Men shouldn’t buy “self-help” books unless the subject matter is car maintenance, golf swing improvement or how to disassemble a fucking Browning BAR. We don’t improve ourselves, we improve our stuff.
And finally, I want men everywhere to going back to being Real Men. To open doors for women, to drive fast cars, to smoke cigars after a meal, to get drunk occasionally and, in the words of Col. Jeff Cooper, one of the last of the Real Men: “to ride, shoot straight, and speak the truth.”
Amen to that.