From Satire To Truth

Scrappleface:

President George Bush today announced a major strategy shift in his re-election campaign brought on by what he described as “the failure of my nominal opponent to present a single reason voters should support him.”

The Bush-Cheney campaign will now simply ignore John Forbes Kerry, the Democrat candidate and Vietnam veteran who is also a U.S. Senator.

“It’s hard to mount an entire campaign against an opponent who has no record, no bedrock values, no consistent positions, no new ideas and only wants to talk about something he hasn’t done for 35 years,” said Mr. Bush. “So far, the fight has been between me and anti-me…Bush against hate-Bush. From now on, we’re looking at a one-man race for the presidency.”

Campaign insiders said TV and radio ads will no longer mention the Democrat candidate, but will simply focus on the president’s record and his vision for the future.

“I can’t change people whose hearts overflow with hatred,” said the president. “So I’ll just focus on rallying those whose minds are still open. We’re going to target what you call your sentient beings.”

ABC’s political “blog” The Note:

“There will be a time for debates after the convention, and during the next few weeks, John Kerry should take the time to finish the debates with himself. This election presents a clear choice to the American people between a President who is moving America forward and a Senator who has taken every side of almost every issue and has the most out of the mainstream record in the U.S. Senate,” said BC’04 spokesman Steve Schmidt.

2 thoughts on “From Satire To Truth

  1. Is Kerry possible one of the worst presidential candidates in the last 50 or so years?

    Let’s face it…the liberal media and the 527s are what is propping up the Kerry Kamp…Evan Thomas of Newsweek estimates that the media is worth around 15 points to Kerry…substract out the bias in the media and the Dem 527s, and Bush would be winning by at least 20 points…

  2. Having only one candidate, refuse any debate with your opponent, call your supporters the “open-minded”, and discredit the rest of the population…that’s any dictator’s dream (no need to compare with the former soviet union, today’s Putin strategy is a very good example).

    Now it’s a lot clearer what’s in the mind of Bush and the GOP partisans.

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