In proof that sometimes reality is stranger than fiction, the Vatican has produced a sex guide for Italian Catholics:
The controversial book, It’s A Sin Not To Do It, written by two theologians, promises the reader answers to “everything you wanted to know about sex but the Church (almost) never dared to tell you”.
In their attempt to galvanise the faithful, Roberto Beretta and Elisabetta Broli, who write regularly for the Italian Bishops’ magazine, Avvenire, have written one of the raciest works ever to deal with the Church and sex.
Bullet points on the jacket cover underline the central message: “Sex? God invented it. Original sin? Sex has nothing to do with it. Without sex there is no real marriage.”
“When people think of the Church and sex, they think of prohibitions and taboos,” said Beretta. “But there is a very different and positive side to Church doctrine which needs to be emphasised.”
It’s A Sin Not To Do It?! Are you kidding me? Then again, the original title of Knocking Boots for Jesus was deemed too controversial for publication…
UPDATE: I’m pretty sure I’m going to hell now…
The vatican lost it’s moral authority backing Mussolini and Hitler. I wouldn’t worry about hell based on offending them.
It’s really simple:
John 14:6 Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.
Rom 10:9 That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.
Rom 10:10 For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.
Rom 10:11 For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed.
Rom 10:12 For there is no difference between the Jew and the Greek: for the same Lord over all is rich unto all that call upon him.
Rom 10:13 For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
This link will help you figure out where exactly in hell you are gonna go. (I apparently will end up in the city of Dis, in the sixth level of hell. Bad me…)
http://www.4degreez.com/misc/dante-inferno-test.mv
J.
LOL… I think this proves just how out of touch the Catholic church is. The problem ain’t that the Italians aren’t fucking- the problem is birth control…
Oh well, a few less europeans on the planet. East asia is poised to inherit the earth anyway. 🙂